right now…

• No kids…for the first time in a very, very long time. Hanna spent the night at Aunt Carrie’s and Caleb went to Grandma Fee’s for a few days. And I, of course, was wide awake at 6:15. *sigh*
• 18 days until school starts – yes, we start on a Thursday here. A bit odd, but they claim they get all of that prep/here’s how it goes stuff out of the way on Thursday and Friday and are able to hit the ground running the next Monday. Even with a busy summer, both kids have already mentioned how much they’re looking forward to going back.
  Me too.
• I’m chairing this year’s Ice Cream Social at our church. It’s something we’ve enjoyed as guests during our past few summer visits from Florida, so it’s a little odd to be chairing it this year. I’m looking forward to it, and am enjoying putting all those skills I learned as a scrapbooker – studying fonts and design, working with paper and design – to work in a new way.
• I’m starting off August insanely budgeting and tracking our finances. We know what Tom’s salary is each month from the church, but the rest of our income is a little…hmmmm…flexible. He’ll continue substitute teaching when school starts again and I’ll have a little income stream then too, but it will all vary from month to month, and will only be during the school year so some good saving is going to be a necessity. I’m going back to the old envelope budgeting method that’s always worked well for us. I’m also working through Dave Ramsey’s suggestions for irregular budgets, since we’ll have different paychecks coming in at different times. And I’m tracking this month – every penny – and probably September too, to try to figure out where our money is actually going. It’s a little different, this living in a parsonage when it comes to bills and such.
• I’m obsessed with perfecting my polenta pizza right now. As soon as I can figure out how to crisp that crust a bit more, I’ll be sharing it. I’m craving it right now…at 8 am.
  It’s that good.
• I’ve spent the past few days dreaming about Fall…knowing that leaves will actually turn and fall here, the weather will turn crisp and cool…planning wreaths and our mantle, contemplating having a front porch to decorate, thinking about muffins and scents for the house. Never mind that we’ve got August to get through first. It’s been an oddly mild summer here in Central California – a few hot days, but nothing like I remember. After six summers of Florida humidity, I’m enjoying every second of it.
• Wondering if I can really start getting to the gym by 6:15 when they change their opening time a few days a week. It would make everything else in my day run so much better, but I just don’t know if I can get up that early.
  Strike that.
  I know I can get up that early.
  I just don’t want to.

What’s on your mind right now?

I woke up this morning – a little bit later than usual – to find myself 36 years old.

36.

Beyond the year I was married or the years I had my children, I don’t think I’ve ever known another year of such transition and change as 35.

I’m not sad to have it behind me. It was a year of huge struggle, but also one of huge growth. And really, Lord, I could probably do without any more like it…if I’m going to be totally honest. It wasn’t an easy year, but ultimately it was a good one.

Last year, on my 35th birthday, the kids and I flew home from our California visit. I never would have imagined that a year later, I’d be living in California…in my hometown…the pastor’s wife at the church I went to preschool at and was married in.

At this time last year at this time, I was worried how Hanna would adapt to middle school, where I was going to find good school shoes for caleb and about getting my custom scrapbooking business up and running after my summer break. This year, I have no worries about school (ahem…except for the general financial issues our district is facing) and I’ve said goodbye to for-hire scrapbooking. I’m chairing the ice cream social next month and helping Tom design a church website/blog. Still trying to find a great place to buy shoes for boy who’s feet are two and a half sizes different.

We’re spending the evening with family at an old favorite restaurant (and maybe margarita) and cake here at the parsonage, and I can’t think of a better way to celebrate another year.

36 is going to be good.

Two and a half years ago, I imported about 900 blog posts into WordPress and then sort of forgot about them.

Today, I finally finished…with about another 600 or so posts to boot.

Why the change?

The main reason…I’m tired of paying nearly $9 a month for Typepad.

Simple as that.

The others…I’ve wanted my own domain for a while – something I could build off of and focus around. So Simply Good will allow me to do that – focusing on my desire to live a simple life as a Jesus follower and what that means. There are a few other changes I’ve got coming in the next few weeks, and having more time to write is going to be the result of one of them.

Also, I watched Tom work on a blog for our church today on WordPress and realized how easy it was, and how some of the formatting issues I’ve been having with Typepad weren’t there. There’s a great connectivity that seems to be more easily built in with WordPress that I longed for with Typepad but could never quite get to work.

It is a little nerve-wracking. After six years, I’m quite used to Typepad. There are similarities, but there is a bit of a learning curve for me with WordPress.  I *think* I’m getting things figure out…slowly.  It’s not quite where I want it to be yet, but getting there.

New things take time to figure out.

Here is almost free of boxes…

in the house anyway.

The patio is another story.

Here is the biggest home we've ever lived in…

with more closets to fill, more carpet to vaccuum, twice as many windows as our last home and more counters to clean.

But I'm not complaining.

Here is lots of phone calls…

church business, a refrigerator that doesn't quite work and we haven't really given the number out yet.

There's still a lot to wrap up – pictures that need homes, an empty space behind the dining room table that I'm stumped by, and lots and lots of organizing. And with a new home comes a new normal, a new daily order…something I've yet to discover.

All in all, we feel very settled – perhaps the quickest I've ever felt settled in a home.

Here, I have a sense like I've never had before that God has placed us in this home for a reason and a purpose, and I look forward to exploring it.

Here is wonderful.

Here is home.

I clicked on my blog by accident today, and realized it's been nearly two weeks since I updated anything.  

Good grief!

I've had post ideas…meant to find time to sit down and write them…and just haven't been able to.

Why? 

I have no idea.  It doesn't seem like we're that busy, but the days seem to fly.  It's been three months today since we left Florida, and that's just hard to believe.   A few things that have been filling our days…

• We've been spending lots and lots of time at the Little League park, and those bleachers up there are just about killing my backside!  We've only got one game this next week and then the following week off for Spring Break before May rolls around and we've got two games a week plus practices.  Caleb still absolutely loves it and is already talking about next season.  I'm going to have to invest in some bleacher seats!
• The past week has been wrapped around Caleb being sick – first with the croup (and two pointless doctor's visits) and finally with pneumonia and a trip to the Children's Hospital an hour from us.  He played baseball Monday night, while we thought he was improving.  Not quite.  He's on two antibiotics at the moment and is starting to get well.  He needs to get into an allergist, but attempting to navigate insurance and a new pediatrician isn't making that easy.  
• Lots of gym time for me.  I decided I hit the limit of what I could do on the elliptical this week and 
  decided to add in a little running once or twice a week while on the treadmill.
  oh.my.gosh.
  I could barely walk for 3 days.
  It's good to have something new to beat, though – I need some sort of competition to keep me motivated.  I'm at just over 16 pounds and about a dozen inches lost in the not quite 3 months since
  I started at the gym in late January, and the weightloss just keeps getting more consistent.  
• I read Eat to Live last week, and it really made me think.  I'm always looking for new food inspiration, and while I don't agree with everything…I did agree with a lot of what the author said.  I'm hoping to share soon in one of those posts I want to get written soon.  Very much in line with The China Study, but more on the practical side of things.  
• Still vegetarian.  
  Still don't miss meat.
  In almost two months, I've had a few bites of shrimp and a few bites of lamb stew at my favorite Basque restaurant.  My stomach is still happier with me and my energy levels are great (protein – another post I want to get written in the next few weeks!).

And it's beginning to look like God's plan for us is taking shape.  I'm so anxious to be able to share, but there's so much we're still waiting on.   I'm reminded often of these quotes from Jim Elliot:

God always gives His best to those who leave the choice with him.

and

Lord, make my way prosperous not that I achieve high station, but that my life be an exhibit to the value of knowing God. 

Exciting days are coming…and more posts, too!

It's hard for me to believe it's been two months since we arrived home to California.  In so many ways, it feels like it's been a day…and in so many ways, I can hardly remember what it was like to live in Florida.  I think we're finally feeling really settled, though I'm really struggling to find a good creative place and time for writing and working on my eBay listings. 

So what's going on around here?

Well…

• The baby chicks are no longer babies.  They've definitely entered that awkward adolescent phase.  They'll be moving out to the coop soon.  The layers are finally laying regularly – we're getting two to three eggs a day from them.  By the time the chicks start laying, we could be getting a dozen every two days, and I think I need to start researching some frittata recipes!
• Caleb is all about baseball right now.  He's playing Little League for the very first time and loves it.  Yesterday was supposed to be his first game, but he was just about in tears when he found out this week's games were rescheduled due to the rainy weather we've been having. 
• Hanna's been busy with school and has had several chapters of a story she's working on published on Teen Ink ( I'll link it in if it's okay with her later).   She got her part for the drama club production last week.  She is constantly busy with something.
• I've been down for the past week with a stomach virus that just seems to keep hanging on, but I was finally able to get back to the gym today for a short workout.  Trying to get work done, trying to find time to write and generally feeling frustrated the lack of success in both.   
• Tom's still slogging through this semester's classes pile of work.  I don't think he's ever had this much work for classes before, and I'm thankful he has the time to focus on them right now.  He's preaching this Sunday at a church here in Dos Palos, and we're all praying about a possible opportunity that could be related to that. 

Not terribly exciting, but life has found a rhythm again after so many months of stress and upheaval.  We're still waiting to see God's plan unfold for us, and still holding to these words of Elisabeth Elliot's:

God is God. Because He is God, He is worthy of my trust and obedience. I will find rest nowhere but in His holy will, a will that is unspeakably beyond my largest notions of what He is up to.

 
Caleb in Gallup, NM

One week after we've arrived…

• both kids are successfully in school.  It was easy for Hanna – and such a blessing after the chaos and frustration of the past few months.  She's already found a wonderful group of friends, and is starting Drama Club today (lead by Aunt Carrie).  For Caleb…it was a little more difficult, but he's getting there.  We really didn't take into account that he really only remembers ever living in Florida and how uprooted he would feel.  He's getting a few extra snuggles, a little more time, seems to be making friends now and he's doing better.
• almost everything that needs to be unpacked is unpacked.  There are a few random boxes, and a few things I'm still looking for that I'd really love to find.  Mostly, things are finding homes.  As for the rest?  The storage unit is only about 5 minutes away. 
• I've been in the kitchen almost every night, and it feels great.  A batch of stock, chicken pasta, risotto and roasted vegetables, roast pork and a Mexican feast with my sister (all on different nights)…I never realize how much I miss chopping and stirring until I'm out of the kitchen for a week or so.
• 4 days at the gym this week and it's making a huge difference in my energy levels.  In four days, I'm up to 23 minutes on the treadmill with a few running intervals and 5 or 6 minutes on the elliptical.  The goal for now is to get up to 30 and 10, and then steal time from the treadmill and give it to the elliptical.  I'm already craving more. 
• looks like Tom's interview will be next Friday (the 4th?) in Merced.  We're both excited about this opportunity, but not wanting to get our hopes up.  We'd hugely appreciate any and all prayers.

Photo credit: Hanna Widlund

Too soon, these days are flying.  What seemed like an eternity when we first made the decision to move has in reality been a blink.  The house is more packed than not, see you later's are being said and we have that sense that with every meal out, every stop it might be the last time we pass that way.

Last night was our official going away party, and I have been so overwhelmed by how loved we truly are.  As much as we've felt set adrift by our church leadership, we've been loved and appreciated by the body of Christ in our community.  I can't bear to read the cards and notes yet and from the few I've been able to get through, I'm realizing I just don't know how to say thank you well enough.   I'm hoping I can find time in the next few days to share some of the photos that Tom's mom took for us during the party because I don't want to forget. 

These next 11 days will go so quickly.  A few lunches and dinners with friends, a trip to Universal for the kids, a moving sale and wedding this weekend, more packing…too soon these days are flying.  There's so much I want to share, to say, to write and there just isn't time at the moment.  As much as I dread this change, I look forward to this all being done, to finding a new rhythm and to exploring God's vision for this new chapter. 

Soon…

 
I love this time of year, when a simple walk to the mailbox brings smiles instead of just bills.

When we were first married, I could never seem to get it together enough to get Christmas cards out.  Once we moved to Florida, about 3000 miles away from most of our family and friends, they became more of a necessity.  And then they became something I found I really enjoyed working on.  By September, I had the starts of the letter rolling around in my head (yes, I'm one of those people) and was thinking about clothes and sites for taking pictures. 

This year, I'm kind of feeling guilty as I make that walk from the mailbox with cards in hand since we decided not to send cards to save a little bit extra towards our move home.

As I've played around with the Christmas letter in my head, it's been a little depressing…

After the amazing highlights of our cross country train trip with my parents in June and my brother's wedding in September, we realized this fall that we would lose our home.  Even better, we found out Tom's position at church was being cut to part time, making it no longer viable for him to continue to work there and we'll be making the move home – with no job – to live with my parents for a while.

Hmmm…just not the sort of Christmas letter I want to recieve!

(and please note – I'm writing in a spirit of humor, even if it's a little dark.  As a friend recently said, "In this situation, you've got to laugh about it or you'll want to slit your wrists."  Again, probably a little dark, but I think there's some truth to finding a bit of  humor in a bad situation.)

Instead, I'm planning on sending out a card when our photos are done and Tom's got a new job.  Sort of a really late Christmas letter/new address card.

Until then, I've been enjoying our last few year's cards…

2007 – they look so little!

 
2008 – the year I gave up trying to get a photo of them together

 2009 – a mad dash last minute stressful shoot at the park

…and  I can't wait to see where the next one will be taken!

 
Realizing it's been a bit of a bummer around here…so to lighten things up a bit, I thought I'd share a few things that have been making my day brighter:

• We have been overwhelmed with love and kind words as our news has gone out.  I've got to get all of the Facebook notes and emails we've received printed – they need to go in a scrapbook somewhere.  Thank you, thank you, thank you to you all.  And thanks to God for the incredible ways He's been providing and making His love known to us in a more tangible manner. 

• This sweater from Old Navy, in a darker brown than they currently have available. I ordered it the day after Thanksgiving – they seem to have the only fit of jeans Tom likes in the whole wide world, and they were on sale for $15 a pair.  So was the sweater.  It came on Tuesday and I've found a reason to wear it every day since because it feels like wearing a warm, cozy afghan.  In fact, I might have worn it to the grocery store this morning with an ancient pair of navy sweatpants.  
  Dear Santa, I'd really love some sort of new sweatsuit-ish type outfit. 
  But not velour.
  *shudder*

• Waiting for me…umm…I mean Tom and I in California.  I have wanted one of these babies for years and can I just say my Mom is awesome?  Knowing it's waiting is going to make that 2800 mile drive a little more enjoyable.
  Side note: Out of all of the colors to choose from, my sister and I picked the exact same one.  We've also bought the exact same pair of shoes on the same day on opposite sides of the country.  I love my sister =)
• Grandma Fee arrives next Wednesday!  There's a lot of stuff packing and organizing wise that I'm pulling a Scarlett O'Hara on…I can't think about that right now. If I do, I'll go crazy. I'll think about that tomorrow…substituting Thursday for tomorrow. 

• Mint M&M's=crack.
  Just sayin'.
• Christmas specials, and kids to cuddle while watching them.  
  Sure, Charlie Brown, I can tell you what Christmas is all about. 
  And I'm in tears every.single.time.
  I love that the kids enjoy treasure these traditions as much as I do.
• Cold weather.  It's been cold.  Like honest-to-goodness-really-cold-and-not-just-Florida-version-of-cold here this week, and it actually feels like Christmas.  We've got a little warm up this weekend, and then more real cold next week.  My toes aren't exactly as happy about it as I am and my skin is going insane.  I need to get this figured out a bit better before I get back to California in January!
  Santa, are you still there?  I think a pair of slippers would be nice too.  Maybe moccasins? 
• My Kindle and it's cute green case.   It's taken me a while to get used to it, but I'm finally hooked.  I love too books – the feel, the smell, the touch – too much to ever completely go e-reader, but I adore how easy my Kindle is on my eyes.  Being able to just download a book from Amazon at home is kind of nice too.
  Santa?  Amazon gift certificates are good too!
• Watching casting come together for The Hobbit, in particular Martin Freeman as Bilbo Baggins.  Loved him as Tim in the BBC version of the Office and positively adored him in the Sherlock series that ran on Masterpiece Theater (and if you haven't watched that, you simply must!).  It makes me smile everytime I see a new face that's been added to the cast.
• Back to homeschooling…sort of.  Because December is a short month for school and we're only going to be here for two weeks of January, we decided to switch Hanna to the homeschool option offered by her school to save money.  She goes into school one day a week for tests and to work on-campus, and they provide the curriculum.  On her homestudy days, she sets her goals each and I just sort of supervise and hop in if she needs help.  Why didn't I know about this last year????  It's been nice.
• Lots of time to think and process.  I closed up my studio until after the move and I'm avoiding thinking about packing (see above), which has given me lots of time to think…about my faith, about the sort of church I desire, about the sort of pastor's family I feel like we're called to be, about my hopes and goals for the future.  There's so much in my head that needs to come out, and it will…soonish.

What's on your happy list today?